Big emotions are part of childhood. Sometimes, though, reactions become so intense, frequent or hard to recover from that they begin to affect everyday life.
Parents may describe tantrums, meltdowns, aggressive behaviour, defiance, refusal, impulsive behaviour or simply “big reactions”. A child may cope well in one setting but fall apart in another, become overwhelmed by small changes, or know the rule but still struggle to use it when upset.
These difficulties are sometimes described as challenges with emotional regulation, behavioural regulation or self-regulation.
At Tesserae, we look beyond the behaviour itself. We ask what may be making the situation difficult, what the child is trying to achieve or avoid, and what skills could help them respond more safely and independently.
Parents often come to us with some version of these:
The behaviour may look different from child to child. What matters is whether the same pattern is repeatedly making routines, school, relationships or family life harder.
Instead of starting with a label, we look at the pattern and what tends to happen around it.
Behaviour happens for a reason. What looks like “naughty behaviour” does not tell us very much about why it is happening.
A child may be testing a boundary, but they may also be overwhelmed, trying to avoid something difficult, struggling with a change, trying to get access to something important, or simply not yet have a more effective way to respond.
There is no single number of tantrums, meltdowns or minutes that automatically means a child needs therapy. We pay more attention to intensity, recovery, safety and impact on everyday life.
We do not start by choosing a behaviour strategy from a list. We first work out what is happening, which skills are missing, and what may need to change around the child.
Depending on where the difficulty occurs, support may include individual Behaviour Support, parent collaboration, School Observation or In-School Behaviour Support, and collaboration with other professionals where appropriate.
Programmes are clinically supervised by our BCBA and BCBA-D team.
Progress is not simply “fewer tantrums”. We look for signs that your child has more useful ways to handle difficult moments and needs less adult support to do so.
No. We support children based on the difficulties they are experiencing, not whether they have a diagnostic label. A diagnosis can provide useful context, but it is not required before we can work on behaviour, emotional regulation, flexibility or impulse control.
This is common. Some children use a great deal of effort to cope with the structure and demands of school, then have far less capacity left by the time they are home. The environments may also have different expectations, triggers and supports. We look at the pattern rather than assuming one setting shows the “real” behaviour.
People use these words differently, and the label alone does not tell us what is happening. A tantrum may be more closely linked to trying to change an outcome, while a meltdown is often used to describe a loss of regulation when demands or emotions become overwhelming. In practice, we focus on the context and what would help rather than relying on the label alone.
No. Tesserae is a behavioural intervention centre, and our clinicians are behaviour specialists rather than counsellors, psychotherapists or medical doctors. Our work focuses on understanding behaviour, teaching practical skills and helping those skills become more independent in everyday life.
Often, yes, but this does not mean parents are being blamed. Behaviour happens in context. Small changes in how adults give instructions, prepare for difficult situations, respond to escalation or reinforce new skills can make it easier for a child to succeed. We aim for strategies that are realistic for family life.
Where useful, yes. If concerns are mainly occurring at school, collaboration can help us understand classroom expectations and whether the same skills are transferring there. With parental consent and the school’s agreement, this may include teacher collaboration, school observation or direct in-school support.
This page provides general information and does not provide a diagnosis or replace medical or psychological advice. Where another assessment or specialist service is appropriate, we will recommend that families speak with the relevant professional.
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